Today is a holiday (Independence Day) so The Husband is home. We are avoiding malls right now because of the flu so we’ll just do a quick grocery shopping at Robinson’s. We’re really thankful that the Robinson’s grocery store is only a five-minute drive from our house. I’m still going to work because after that early morning shopping, I really need to finish my already very delayed project so I can get paid.

I won a design bid yesterday. I was so shocked because I wasn’t really counting on winning. It was actually just an experiment to see if the project owners award the project based on the lowest bid or the quality. Since I’m one of the higher bidders, you could say it’s the latter. I still think the rates are too low during bidding wars. If I participate in lowering my rate for the sake of winning, then it will be harder for designers worldwide to give a fair price.

That’s about it this Friday. Have a good weekend all of you!

If there’s one thing I’d change about that night, it would be that we’ll try to go home earlier. OR, we will not eat the food from CCME. We all had tummy problems after eating the leftover food that I hoarded after the party. OR I will not drink Tequila (perhaps 4 shots will do) too much. OR I will speak in a normal volume. OR I will just drink plenty of vitamin C from now on.

Sigh. My only wish for Christmas is that we will all get better and that we will not welcome New year with another episode. It sucks to feel like this, really.

But back to the party. It was so good to see old friends again. Some of them we haven’t seen for more than two years so it was a very memorable night. The number of kids have increased too so double the fun. We weren’t able to take pictures of the much-awaited gift giving because we were all busy handing out gifts and hoarding them at the same time. So to my offline friends who are probably lurking my blogs and flickr for some photos – thank you so much for all your gifts. I was so happy to get my wishlists – Pride and Prejudice and Somewhere in Time DVDs. I would’ve wanted a new set of sexy lingerie but nothing beats watching Mr. Darcy tell Lizzie how she has bewitched him body and soul.

Some photos from that night:

With the kids (three years ago, it was just us posing in that same sofa)

The Men

The Women (nice background BWAHAHA)

When people get married, they forget the romance and immerse themselves instead in the preparations to make it perfect. If I have to do it all over again, I will book at this jamaica all inclusive resort and spend my days getting excited with my future husband. An inclusive resort like the one that Super Club offers is highly recommended when it comes to non-stressful weddings. You can add as many amenities as you want on your package and even have the wedding ceremony for free.

Some married couples I know decide to renew their vows while they’re enjoying their romantic vacations. At SuperClubs, if you decide to do that, they will arrange it immediately. SuperClubs guarantee a wedding made in heaven but even if it’s a simple ceremony or a renewal of vow, then you can be sure it will be as romantic, what with the perfect backdrop of the blue ocean, white sandy beaches and palm trees.

I always wake up feeling bad, hurt or longing. But mostly, I just want to reach out to him and have him hold me. Because even if those annoying stuff and non-stop bickering happen in real life as well, I’m a bit happy that it’s not happening right that moment, that it was all just a dream. Most of the time my dreams will show me that I married someone else or that I haven’t even met The Husband. Or that I’m going out with an ex-boyfriend who wasn’t really right for me and that I’m looking for a way to break up with him but I can’t. So I’m always glad to wake up. Relieved to see The Husband’s face and know that I’m lucky I found him, despite our differences. Which if you think about it, isn’t all that much.

I remember that The Husband and I got ours as soon as we’ve decided to have a child. When you’re single or childless, these things doesn’t really enter your mind, especially if it won’t benefit you directly. But when you have a child, his/her future is the only important thing that you’d do whatever you can to make sure they’ll get by even when you’re gone.

Not many people would like to talk about death and beyond but it’s always best to be prepared. If you still don’t have life insurance, I highly suggest you get one. The healthier and younger you are, the cheaper you will have to pay.

We left Sandy at home and went out with high hopes for the evening (well me at least). We wanted to window shop for hours because we can’t do this with a toddler in tow. However, I’ve made reservations at The Spa in Greenbelt at 6PM which meant we only have about 1 and a half hour to shop. It was tiring and a bit stressful plus the traffic was so bad. As expected, The Husband wasn’t in his best mood.

We went to The Spa so he can have a relaxing facial massage while I was booked for a full body swedish massage. But it turned out that the face massage was very short (less than 45 minutes) and it hurt a lot. To make matters worse, my massage / bath etc took so long that he has been waiting in the lobby for more than an hour, starving and still remembering the pain. So yes, you could say that he was still in a very bad mood.

I was starting to lose hope because it was 8:30PM and we couldn’t decide where to eat. There’s no way I can convince him to get out of Greenbelt, given his mood and near-starvation so we just walked around GB2. Grappa’s didn’t look appetizing so I told him to just pick one restaurant and we will eat there. We passed by Maurcier (I’ll have to verify the name) and saw the black drapes, silver chandeliers, great food photography and decided to try it out. Well he just said “tara, yan lang” because we just have no choice. We even had a small argument on where we’re going to sit. That’s how petty we can get when we think the night was ruined and that we’re just going through the motions to get it over with.

But as soon as we touched the menu, we forgot about everything. Food is something that we’re very passionate about and studying the menu is one of our most favorite things to do together. In short, the evening was saved and we had a lovely time choosing from the wine list alone. It was all good despite his spa experience and my constant worry of having an imperfect date. I had our camera all to myself too and he won’t let me give it back to him. He said it’s because so I can document the night on my own, without his help. And no, we didn’t talk about our feelings. Good food is our thing and that was enough for us.

The Husband – was gracious enough to have his photo taken. His skin looked much better after the face massage. Too bad it hurts.

Movie on the wall – Audrey Hepburn reruns

The night couldn’t be more perfect if you ask me. Just like after our wedding day when we were so starving we ended up eating our first dinner as husband and wife at McDonalds.

Topic No. 1: Life After the Wedding – the Married Life.
What are the things you want them to know about life after the wedding?

When I got married, my mother had a very long speech. She spoke so fast for fear of water works that it was hard to understand what she was saying half the time. But the one thing that stayed with me is this: “Marriage is not a bed of roses”

I know before I got married that marriage life has ups and downs. But I had no idea how hard it could be. There are shouting matches, cold treatments, and resentment in every actions and words. And that was when we didn’t have a kid. Now, it’s so much harder because there’s just no time to talk about what happened. We had to kiss and make up quickly for our daughter’s sake that we always fail to find a solution to our problem.

So here’s what I’m going to tell Sandy:

You enter marriage not because all your friends are married and you’re sick of being alone but because you’ve found a person you cannot live without. Since you can’t imagine your life without him, you need to accept all his habits, his fears and weaknesses, his dreams no matter how far fetched they are. Remember your vows everyday – for better or worst, for richer or for pooer, in sickness and in health. It’s a cliché but this is true: “ang pagaasawa ay hindi parang kaning isinubo”. This is why marriage is hard work. Romance fades, even love. It’s a two-man team and both of you should do your best, as if your lives depend on it, to make it work.

Trust me when I say that there will be moments when you just want to be out. But as long as he’s not hurting you and your kids (physically and emotionally), you need to be strong and work with your husband to resolve your differences. Always put yourself in his shoes. Why is he acting this way? Was it something about you or could it be that it’s just who he is? Remember that even though marriage united you as one, you’re still two different people who have different views, dispositions, ways of expressing love and emotion. Find a balance too between being a part of a married couple and being your old self. When the other half is growing up (career, money, hobbies, etc), the other one should be too or else she/he would feel left out. This is where resentment and unhappiness enter the picture.

Be loyal to your spouse. You may find someone else better, stronger, etc. and even if you tell him so (which I suggest you don’t), at the end of the day, you’re still a team and he depends on you to believe in him (and vice versa). Never air out your dirty laundry with the opposite sex no matter how close you are with them. Telling your friends is one thing, but to pour out your heart to a male friend might be taken the wrong way. Communicate with your husband instead, that’s what marriage is for. No matter how hard you fight or whatever conflicts you may have, it should always be you and him against the world.